When a young man starts contemplating marriage in Nigeria, the mother or sisters would ask him to invite the lady over for rating. These are some of the key areas that the lady would be rated on. They are rating her on her ability to:
- Cook, sweep and clean*
- Keep the home front*
- to be subservient*
- take care of children*
- endless list of ratings*****
Now these are men who have never cooked any meal for themselves, they do not clean their rooms, or wash their clothes, they usually have very poor personal hygiene, they eat and the plates would not be washed for weeks, rooms are untidy, basic cleanliness, they have not been taught, yet they are rating another person on these same areas. Their own mothers/ sisters who are rating another lady on these areas have failed to teach the same skills to their son. Why then do they need a wife? Or better still, maybe they are searching for a slave?
I remember one “funny” Ibo business man I dated before I got married, he would always come to my house on Saturdays to quarrel with me over the fact that I did not come to his house for the weekend to wash his clothes and cook for him. Saturdays for me then was my own “HOLY” day of rest, for a banker who leaves home for the office by 5.30am to get back at 10/11pm Mondays through Fridays. After driving through Lagos traffic Monday to Friday, why on earth should I go to another person’s house on the weekend to cook for him? I was still struggling to find the time to make my own meals and wash my own clothes…….Of course I could not even afford the time to wash those clothes, I had to send those clothes to the drycleaner so I can have my sanity and get my rest and peace of mind during the weekend.
Such men only need slaves and there is a place they can go to buy them. We need to get some men to understand that there is a difference between a wife and a slave.
Then to you ladies still slaving around for such men, I am really sorry for you ladies. What is going to happen is that you have reduced yourself to a slave and when the abuse starts before or after you get married to him, you only have yourselves to blame.
Please always learn to set standards for yourself before you introduce a man into your life. You have a right to your own standards of living.
#marriageamebo
#getalife